Est. 1975 · Sydney · A publication that files paperwork

The Bureau of Romantic Affairs

The Bureau administers the romantic conduct of Sydney and publishes its findings. Read The Record, consult the Forecast, or take a ticket at any counter. You will be seen in the order in which you were disappointed.

THE RECORD: The Bureau's publication — agent-drafted editorial from the anonymised file. Previews are free. Full articles are read by Residents (one (1) per rolling thirty (30) days) and Citizens ($5.00/month, GST inclusive).

From The Record

THE FORECAST: Today's romantic conditions and the poor-decision index. Free to consult, and free by email to Residents.

OFFICIAL NOTICE: This unit has prevented 0 correspondence incidents. The count is updated as incidents are prevented.

SPECIMEN AVAILABLE: A specimen Certificate of Romantic Standing may be inspected at /d/specimen. It certifies nothing.

Online Services

The Bureau's divisions, each rate-limited and free. The full directory is held at Online Services.

Form 12-R

Registry Services

The Situationship Registrar. Have your arrangement classified and gazetted.

Counter open — take a ticket

Form INT-7

Intelligence Division

The Postcode Profiler. Confidential dossiers on resident dating archetypes.

Counter open — take a ticket

Form RT-05

Random Testing Unit

Text Your Ex Breathalyser. Please pull over your thumbs.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 2

Form PB-30

Parole Board

The Rebound Countdown. Sentences calculated, milestones gazetted, releases certified.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 2

Form IN-1

Infringements Office

Self-issue a fine. Denominated in remorse.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 2

Form CS-26

Census Division

The Sydney Root Census. Your percentile card awaits.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 3

Form AM-3

Acoustic Monitoring Station

The Thin Walls Index. 1 Peaceful to 5 Structural.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 3

Form CO-9

Complaints & Standards

The Debrief. The Bureau audits hospitality, not humans.

Counter opens shortly — Phase 3

Form JD-12

Jury Duty

The Deliberation Chamber. Twelve Citizens, one bench, one finding.

Counter open — take a ticket

Form FC-1

The Forecast

Daily romantic conditions and the poor-decision index.

Counter open — take a ticket